Obsession

I am officially not the old me anymore. Back then, I never participate an any clubs or societies.

Well, I did join clubs, just that I never attented their weekly meetings and any event which the club held. Now, I am more than an 'Ahli Biasa' in the club I joined. I hold a post in the club, went for several meetings and participated in past events. In fact, I'm now part of the committee which is in-charge of the latest event.

Is this good news? To be involving myself in things happening around me, to be part of something, to hang out with people instead of hiding in the room all day. I think it's a good start to pull myself back to the active form since I've been in the inactive form for at least 5 years.

Talk about good news, there is a good news which happened today. I HAVE SAM'S CONTACT NUMBER! I did not get it from someone else, I did not make people ask for his number OK. But I did not ask him for his number myself either. Whatever. His contact number is displayed on the notice board, and I happen to see it, so... But not that I'm that desperate to contact him OK.

Actually I am, but I have dignity too! I have his number written down on a paper but I don't plan to save it in my phonebook. What if he's not gay? I might freak him out if I contact him for no reason. Now that MY contact number is also on the notice board, I don't have to worry him not knowing my number, unless he didn't read the notice or he's not interested in me, or he doesn't know my name at all. I hope he knows my name, if not I can die. I spent so much time stalking him and if he's interested in me but didn't bother to even find out my name, he's done for.

Wish I could message and let him know how much I like him. But things will be better if we introduce ourselves to each other and exchange numbers and from there we see how we work things out.

The time I spent thinking of things like this, it'd be of much better use if I used it on my studies. I'd become the top student in my group already. Hah.